Trying To Balance This Unbalanced Life

How do parents find balance? Hell, I can't even balance on one foot. And as for juggling, well I can't juggle more than two balls at once. Balancing life is hard. It was hard prior to becoming a mom, which is a 24-7 job.

I've always been a 110% kind of person. I want to do everything fully and to the best of my ability. In high school I wanted to get straight As, have a social life and be in a ton of clubs. Same goes for college, only add some alcohol and partying into the mix. Now at 30 I'm still the same way. I'm working full time as an Animal Control Officer, I'm a full time mom, wife, a dog and cat mom, home owner, friend, blogger, fitness chick, home cook, dog sitter...oh and  I got the crazy idea to try and learn how to break dance and take some self defense classes. I forget...I'm supposed to sleep at some point.

As you can see balance is a hard thing for me to achieve. There is so much I want to do, and do well. I mean YOLO right?! But the more I put on my plate, the less time and energy that I can dedicate to each area of my life. Sometimes I spend a couple of days each week focusing on certain areas, sometimes I try and devote a little time every day to each area and sometimes I get overwhelmed and cut out some things.

Let me clarify one thing, being a mom is always and will always be number one. My kid comes before everything else on the list including eating, sleep and binge watching cooking shows. All of which are very near and dear to my heart.  Being a mom is my first identity but it's not my only identity.     

Balancing life with kids is an art form. I would place myself in first grade in the school of balancing life.  However, I've picked up some key pointers and important life lessons already in my learning. The first is to prioritize. Is it more important to spend time with my husband cuddling on the couch and watching one of our favorite shows, or do I need to do laundry? Should I spend time playing cars with my son, since he keeps bringing me every hot rod in his collection, or should I finish cleaning the counters?  Prioritize so that when you only get to ten things on your hundred item list they are the most important things you can accomplish. You will always have a list. Chores and red tape will always be there for another time; how nice of them.

I'm also learning to set my expectations low. I get so frustrated when I have it all planned out what I'm going to accomplish during the day and I only get to a few things done on my list. It can make me have less patience, be angry and feel bad about myself. It's important to take time to appreciate everything that you have accomplished during the day. Oh I successfully kept a toddler, two dogs, a cat and myself alive and mostly happy during the day, gold star to me! Oh, I was able to successfully work thru a toddler tantrum in the grocery store because we didn't stop to get a cookie at the bakery, go me! There is so many seemingly little but important things that we accomplish in the day so give yourself props for doing it all.

Now, we all know that a day with a kid never goes as planned, but we forget to factor that in sometimes when we plan our day. Maybe you are out at the grocery store and your little one suddenly becomes possessed and has a complete melt down that you can't recover from. Or you go to take your little one to the mall only to pull in to the store and realized that your kid exploded out of his diaper everywhere and you definitely need to go home and sanitize or maybe throw away everything. Things happen that we can't predict or control. Our lives are constantly structured and chaotic all at the same time. Set your goals low and allow yourself time for crazy life to happen.

Also, make sure that you are a priority. You need to sleep, eat, relax and feel good about yourself to take care of your family. When I take time to recharge, whether it's a fifteen minute escape to the bathroom to "poop," or  a few hours to shop, I feel so much more mentally and physically prepared to take on a toddler.

Lastly, don't compare yourself to other moms. That one can be hard for me. I see a mom that's super in shape or always has her make up and hair done and I get envious. First of all, good to all of those moms out there! But also good for you, for the priorities you chose, and the women that you inspire. Remember that we all focus on different things and balance life differently. We all have different strengths and different weaknesses. Be proud of who you are, the amazing qualities that you have and the wonderful things you focus your time on.

I'm going to keep on trying to navigate the art of balancing this hectic and awesome life. I wish you the best of luck on your journey to do the same. Please feel free to comment on how you balance life and what you focus on.